Keep questions and conversation to present and future tense as much as possible, she recommends. Facing forward invites your date to project and talk about what you want to do together in the future as opposed to focusing on the past—which was clearly not together.” And for more great dating advice, here are 30 things women always love to hear. “In order to find a relationship, you need to be honest about yourself. On the first date, the goal is to peel back a layer or two—maximum—about yourself.Share your values, your background that shaped those values, and some of your interests.And, for what it’s worth, she’s really, go-to dating advice that anyone can apply to their lives—no matter the size of his or her banking account—and, with her help, we’ve compiled them all right here.
Sure, you might have a specific idea of what you’re looking for, but instead of just considering your date’s job, where they grew up, and who their favorite author is, give more weight to how you actually feel when talking to them.
“Focusing on facts can feel like an interrogation or an interview,” Andersen explains.
Invite your date to share their values and passions in life,” she suggests.
With each successive date, you peel back another couple layers.
Here’s how: “Be the first to bring it up with something like: ‘So a little about me. We got married rather young and in retrospect, I should have waited until I learned more about myself. Do you consider yourself to be in a good place now? Now, here are more things you should definitely say on the first date.
We had really good times, a beautiful child together, and while I am not perfect at all, I will walk into my next relationship with tremendous insights and wisdom about what makes a relationship a great one. There’s plenty of time to learn about a potential mate’s past if you keep seeing each other, but what you care about early on should be their present and future, Andersen says. That’s because it can come back to bite you down the line.And that’s where Amy Andersen, founder and CEO of Linx Dating, comes into play.She’s worked with many of the biggest names in Silicon Valley to help make their personal lives as successful as their professional ones.For example, if you’re divorced, it’s pretty much inevitable that you’ll end up talking about it on the first few dates.Instead of waiting for them to ask you about your relationship history, Andersen says you can actually flip the whole situation on its head and broach the subject before they ask. Apply this technique to any big reveal you want to get out in the open, and you’ll end up looking both confident and honest.For that, I am thankful to be getting to know you tonight.” Bring it from the past to the present, and then move on to the next subject, ASAP.