See if there were any mutual friends just to get more insight about that person’s character and that family’s character and the reputation that they have.And then, if both families have approved it, then we would get married.”Are you on any dating apps?You want someone who is going to be able to enjoy sharing these experiences with you.
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As much as I love sharing my dating stories, there are a lot of experiences that I haven't had. I was 11 years old at the time, and very naive in my understanding about the faith.
That's why, as part of It’s Not You, I'll be talking to people with a broad range of experiences to see how things are different — and how they're the same. I didn’t understand the politics of what 9/11 meant, and it was just a very tough time for Muslims in general.
Even in the most traditional Islamic way, there’s so much romance. The women are not sitting at home waiting for their husbands to come back.”I feel like that’s the perception a lot of people have about Muslim women.“That’s not the case at all.
The prophet himself — there are stories of him being super romantic and sweet to his wife. The reason I even reached out was because, for a while, I didn’t know what my future would look like in terms of how you’re supposed to find the Muslim man who also has a good sense of humor, is intelligent, is family-oriented.
And then, maybe during the third or fourth conversation, it comes up.”I just have to tell them! They just don’t know the depths and the gravity of what that means and what they’d really commit to.
I am at this point in my life where I would love to build a family and settle down. And men who are like that, you’re just like, Oh yes. I’m 27 years old, and I feel like I’ve just calibrated my fuckboy meter. If they don’t advocate dating, then what happens if you meet someone? I do want to reiterate that ‘American dating’ is totally against Islamic standards.I would assume he’s already spoken to his parents about it.Actually, he’s had to already have spoken to his parents. So his parents have given him the okay to move forward.And then you have the opposite, where it’s like, you’re on these dating apps, and you have these hookups, and sometimes it works, and other times it doesn’t. But they don’t encourage ‘dating.’ They have encouraged me getting married. And you’re going to meet men — men who are not Muslim.And you know it’s difficult because I do see that men do want to start flirting with me.So, you think, “I tend to find myself in these situations when I know that my ultimate goal is to marry a Muslim.